Ode to Clomid

Yep, I am going to hit the top of all the country billboard charts with my new single (soon to be released) "Waiting to Ovulate." Don't you think that makes for a great country tune? Can't you just hear the lyrics: "AF ain't late, so I've made another IUI date, waiting, waiting, waiting, just waiting to ovulate."

There! See, no tears in my beer, no low-down cheatin, just another date with that tom-cat catheter (sounds quasi-grisly-sexual doesn't it?) Of course, the followup smash hit to that tune will be "I've got the Progesterone Blues..."

I've been thinking about story-telling since I am a theologian and wrote part of my dissertation on how the bible is full of 'stories' which we have lost the ability to appreciate (read: fundamentalism and the modern drive for factual accuracy). The infertile women in the bible fascinate me. What I long to see is the real low-down on how Sarah supposedly felt when God told her she would conceive "in His time" when she was then in her seventies. Her daily blog would have been quite interesting, don't you think? One day she wakes up (by then she was in her nineties, so the story goes) and no more AF and a swelled belly. She shouts out "IT'S ABOUT TIME..."

Okay, so I am a irreverant theologian. I should have warned you about that. I'll blame it on the Jesuits...they did it. They drug me through all of my fundamentalist upbringing presumptions about religion and made me really think, yes, THINK about what I believe. Boy, that led me down some dark roads with not much company other than some dead philosophers. However, here I sit full of hope (cautious hope) that God is going to somehow wave his fertility wand and send some luck my way this month. Perhaps this divine movment will even sound like a Harry Potter spell--"Expecto Maternityum!"

My husband has astutely pointed out that no one has commented on my blog. Uuuuh, I told him that someone has to be invited to read it first. I guess I should get around to looking into that. Otherwise, I just might be guilty of talking to myself. I suppose worse charges have been leveled against me, but that's another discussion for another day.